Hysteroscopy and Polpectomy Update

It’s done!! We got there at 8:30am and we were taken back relatively quickly. Everything went smoothly!

While I was still in recovery, the doctor went and talked to Chris and showed him pics from the scope. There were definitely polyps there. Prior to surgery they came in with a cartoon drawing of my uterus and showed where they thought 1-2 polyps were. Well, they got in there and there were 8-10 all clustered together! So they removed them all and everything is cleaned out and ready for baby#2!

Definitely in some pain. Trying to distract myself and take it easy! Just wanted to drop in and share how it went! All is well and I am home cuddling with little man! 

Maybe Baby 2.0??

I know I have been quiet for the past, oh, I don’t know…year or so! That’s what happens when you finally get your bouncing little miracle! They take all your time!! So worth it, but man, oh, man some days I don’t even get my morning cup of coffee!

So what is this post about? Baby#2! Well, our steps towards getting Baby#2 on board! 

Back in February we did another egg retrieval cycle when Caleb was only 5 months old and we were in the middle of renovating our main floor ourselves. Smart. I know. Anyways, we ended up with 2 snowbabies! We have been patiently waiting until Caleb turned a year old before going back to our RE and discussing transfer.

A few days after Caleb’s birthday we headed to our RE and brought Caleb. He was wearing his The Little Embryo That Could tee and everyone loved it. The receptionist took a picture and sent an email out to the whole staff! We decided to do the same protocol as before, the Letrozole prep for FET. (If you haven’t heard of this, please research it. I found it to be so much better on my body and everyone I have spoken with that has done this approach has had a successful pregnancy!)

I did need to have another Saline Infused Sonogram done to check out my uterus. Luckily this time was a lot less painful than last time! Since our RE is at a teaching hospital, there was the nurse, our RE, a Fellow and a medical student present for the procedure. At one point, they all got quiet and they heads were tilted to the side. They saw something in there that they aren’t sure what it is. Could be scar tissue from my C section, could be a polyp, could just be “junk” as they so eloquently put it. 

That brings us to today! This morning I am going to have a hysteroscopy and polpectomy. They are going to put me under full anesthesia, go in with a scope and remove what isn’t supposed to be in there. Basically make a nice, fresh home for Baby#2. 

With the amount of surgeries I have had in my life, being put to sleep is routine to me. Only this time it’s different. This time I have a son. This time I have a tiny person who will spend his life without his mama if for whatever reason I don’t wake up. I know this is my anxiety getting the best of me and everything with go smoothly and in no time I will be home, curled on the couch with a heating pad and a cup of tea, watching The Real Housewives with my little mama’s boy in my arms. 

Oh! Head over to the Beat Infertility podcast! That link is to our story which is being featured on the podcast TODAY Oct 23rd!! 

I will leave you with some super cute pics of our little man!

Inspired By Bug

In 10 days, my beautiful miracle baby will turn 1 year old! I cannot believe how fast time has flown! He has turned into a kind-hearted sweet little boy whose favorite word is Mama. There is so much I want to write about him as his birthday approaches but that is not what this post is for. 

About three weeks ago, I decided that I wanted to take a leap of faith and start a business that has a good positive message and will hopefully allow me to stay at home with Caleb and his (hopefully) future siblings. So I did a thing…

I created an Etsy shop called Inspired by Bug. Bug is is our nickname for Caleb. I wanted to create clothing and merchandise with a positive message that would support and encourage others, specifically those within the Infertility community. Currently our shop is supporting NICU Awareness Month and donating 20% of our proceeds from our IVF/Infertility section to help support the doctor’s and nurses that care for these tiny miracles.

I am adding new listings everyday and have many things planned for the Infertility Line. One of them being Baby Dust. I purchased a Baby Dust ornament the Christmas before we transferred Caleb and I prayed that that would be the last ornament we put on our Christmas tree without a child. God answered my prayer. I want to provide to others that same hope and encouragement that that small ornament brought to me. 

Currently most of the items are seasonal, inspirational or NICU related however I have two beautiful designs in the shop specific to IVF and Infertility:

The support I have received from the blogging community is beyond words. I looked at my stats prior to starting this post and my blog has been visited over 100,000 times! That is insane! I am beyond thrilled that our story is reaching so many people and that we can provide a ray of hope (and a little humor) along this tiresome an often lonely journey. 

Please take a moment to check out our little shop. Follow us on Instagram @inspiredbybug and join our Facebook group Inspired By Bug VIP to check out deals and giveaways! 

I will not leave you hanging for so long this time! I will be back shortly to talk ALL things Caleb as well as our plans for a sibling! 

Also, our story will be featured on the Beat Infertility podcast on Oct 23rd. The podcast is available on iTunes (and I assume on Android related apps…I don’t know…what can I say? I’m a Mac!)

This is my friend, who has also struggled with Infertility, holding our soon-to-be one year old Caleb! Her shirt says “She Believed She Could and So She Did” and his shirt says “The Little Embryo That Could”

38 Weeks Pregnant!

Wow!! It has been a while! I can’t believe it has been 5 months since my last update. Life has definitely been busy and, honestly, making a tiny human is so exhausting that all I do is eat, sleep and work. So, what have we been up to? Quite a lot. 

Zoey Update:

Zoey is doing great since her surgery. The tumor was benign and there are no signs of cancer anywhere else in her body. She has adapted to being a Tripawd beautifully. She is always the talk of the town whenever we take her anywhere. 

Baby Shower:

My best friend threw me a beautiful baby shower at the beginning of July. It was wonderful to be able to celebrate Baby Caleb with family and friends. We were showered with love. 

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Maternity Photos:

We went ahead and took them at the end of July and I am so glad we did! They turned out amazing!

Work:

Hubby was offered a new position within our company. He started his new position today and it’s nice to have a fresh start. He is also now working in the same building as me so when I return to the office we will be able to carpool which is very convenient. 

Pregnancy Update:

This is what you all have been waiting for. Currently I am 38 weeks 1 day! I can’t even believe that. It feels like it has gone by so fast yet so slow. We have had a few bumps along the way and several visits to L&D. 

• June – I started getting faint and having heart palpitations. I was given an echocardiogram and had to wear a shooter monitor for 24 hours to see what was going on. Turns out I was throwing PVCs which is quite normal, especially in pregnancy due to the added stress on the circulatory system. 

• July – I began experiencing severe pains throughout my abdomen and back. Very similar to gallstone or kidney stone pains. I went to L&D as I was only 28 weeks at the time. I wasn’t having contractions and the doctor chalked it up to gastroenteritis (it wasn’t). We did blood work to check liver functions and all came back normal. 
• August – starting at my 28 week appointment my belly started measuring around 3 weeks ahead. Because I am a bigger girl, I didn’t really think anything of it. By my 32 week appointment it was measuring 36 weeks so my doctor decided to do a growth scan at 34 weeks. At that appointment, Caleb weighed 6lbs 14oz and had 33cm of amniotic fluid surrounding him. He was measuring at 37 weeks gestation. Amniotic fluids levels were high as hey are supposed to be under 25cm. 
• Labor Day – I woke up to wet pants and was afraid my water had broken. Went to L&D and turns out I just peed myself and was advised if my water was to break since I have so much, it would be like a swimming pool. 
• September 8th – at my 36 week appointment I asked if we could do another scan to see if my fluid levels were still high since I wasn’t feeling any better and still had a lot of pain. Caleb weighed in at 7lbs 11oz and my fluid had increased to 36cm. I passed my glucose tolerance test in June so I don’t have gestational diabetes which can cause excess fluid. At this point my doctor became a bit concerned and sent me to Maternal Fetal Medicine for a scan and consult as there can be issues with the baby that can cause excess fluid. 
• September 13th – had my scan at MFM. Caleb weighed in at 8lbs 5oz and I had 32cm of fluid. So I am staying pretty consistent with the high amount of fluid and was officially diagnosed with polyhydramnios. Caleb checked out great. He is swallowing as he should be. There are no obstructions. His bladder and kidneys are functioning great. So I fall in the category of idiopathic polyhydramnios which means, they have no idea why I have it. 
• September 15th – at my 37 week appointment we checked the fluid again. Sitting pretty at 34cm. Caleb scored another 8/8 on his biophysical profile. The tech said he is just happy as can be floating around in his own personal swimming pool. When we saw the doctor, we weighed the risks of letting my go into labor on my own versus inducing or performing a C section. The biggest issue with polyhydramnios, especially as severe as mine (over 35cm is considered severe) is that Caleb won’t engage himself into my pelvis. He will just float until my water breaks. When that happens, the force of the water breaking can cause his cord to prolapse posing a life threatening situation for him. In addition, he is also sunnyside up and no amount of trying to turn him is helping because of the amount of fluid. So when my water breaks and he does descend, he will be face up. Lastly, he is on track to be a 10lb baby. After weighing the pros and cons, we decided the safest way for him to arrive into the world would be by scheduled C section and we went ahead and booked the OR. 
• September 18th – of course since we now have an eviction date scheduled for him, I wake up at 3am with incredible painful pressure and waves of back pain. After trying a warm bath and various positions, the pain wouldn’t cease. 6 hours later we called the doctor to see if I should come in and be checked then off to the hospital we went. I was only 1cm dilated and 30% effaced and the monitor wasn’t showing I was in labor. I have been having “uterine irritations”due to the excess fluid that do show up as small contractions on the monitor. We also found out my tilted uterus has tilted my cervix backwards which made the cervical check extremely painful. We were then discharged and sent home.

So that brings us to today! I am just counting down the hours until Baby Caleb’s arrival. He will be coming into the world on Sunday Sept 25th at 7:30am. I am just trying to take it day by day. We have the nursery finished and the house is almost clean. My mom is having some maids come on Friday to do a deep clean and get it nice for Caleb. 

I think that is all for now. Sorry the post was so long and scatterbrained but I wanted to give an update before his big arrival!

FET#1 Update – CD11 and Tomorrow’s Appointment

It is amazing how quickly and slowly time goes at the same time when you are cycling. I feel like we have been waiting for tomorrow (CD12) for forever…well we kind of have! But at the same time it’s crazy to me that we are already almost halfway through our FET cycle! 

I feel like there is so much pressure surrounding tomorrow’s appointment. The appointment on CD12 of a letrozole prep FET cycle is blood work and ultrasound. This appointment is going to tell us several things: 

• It will show how my body is absorbing the estrogen. I have been on 2mg Estrace for 4 days.
• It will show if my body responded to the letrozole. 
• It will show how many follicles are growing and what their sizes are. 
• Most importantly, it will show if my lining is above the 7mm threshold and is trilaminar (meaning three strips)

Based on the labs and ultrasound results we will find out….

• When we administer the HCG trigger shot to induce ovulation. We know it will be in the morning we just don’t know what day.
• When we start Crinone (progesterone suppositories). This will be the day after the trigger shot and I will be on 1 suppository 1x daily before bed. (Side note: SO excited no PIO shots!!!)
• Most importantly, when our transfer will be!! This will be on the 6th day of taking Crinone. 

So as you can see, tomorrow’s appointment is kind of a big one where we will get a lot of information and find out next steps. To me though, I feel like it’s an even bigger deal. Since we started this journey nine months ago, I have been focusing on milestones. The little accomplishments and steps in our journey that have moved us one step closer to our babies. For our first IVF these were our milestones:

• Clearing all the blood tests, SIS and HSG and get the all clear for IVF. 
• Banking and freezing Chris’s sperm in case for some reason he stopped producing again. 
• Starting injections and obtaining eggs at our retrieval (2 eggs retrieved)
• Using Chris’s sperm to successfully fertilize my eggs
• Transferring our embryos back, even though they were only Day 2 embies. 

When our first IVF cycle failed, we moved on to more milestones:

• Obtaining more eggs than IVF#1 – the doctors and nurses cheered when they got the 3rd egg. I ended up with 14!
• Getting our embryos to make it to blastocysts and be of a good enough grade to freeze (2 snowbabies in the freezer, one 3BB and one 3BB-)

Then it came time for our first FET and our next milestone:

• Grow a thick enough lining (7mm) and a nice trilaminar home for our snowbabies to proceed to transfer.

Well, that is the milestone that we haven’t been able to cross yet. This is our roadblock and what is holding us back from being reunited with our snowbabies. This is the milestone that we have been waiting months to pass. Tomorrow’s appointment will hopefully remove this road block and we can be on to our next milestone: Snowbabies surviving the thaw. This time tomorrow…actually, this time in a little over 12 hours, we will know if my lining has become a nice home for our babies. 

I am excited, but I am also reserved. I haven’t been as excited during this cycle as I thought I would be because in the back of my mind I am so concerned about this appointment and passing this milestone. I don’t even know where we go from here if my lining is still thin. I don’t want to think about it. Right now I am in a “failure is not an option” mode. And I am positive and hopeful for good results tomorrow, but I will definitely breathe a little easier after the appointment knowing that we are set to transfer next week. 

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. Every step of this journey is wonderful but it does take an emotional toll. I pray I will have good news for everyone tomorrow!! 

A brief note on side effects: I have definitely been more tired and dizzy. Every time I close my eyes the world spins. I have also been having cramps and twinges/pain in my ovaries. Sometimes very sharp pains. I feel bloated and my lower abdomen feels very “full”. I have had some mood swings but not nearly as bad as previously. I have been sleeping like a rock. 

  

FET#1 Update – CD3 Baseline

It has been 121 days since we started this transfer cycle. That is crazy! Well hopefully we won’t have to wait too much longer. I took my NuvaRing out on the 22nd and Aunt Flo arrived on the 27th. I emailed my nurse on the 28th to book my CD3 baseline ultrasound, only to find out my nurse has left the practice! Cue tears! She was my rock! She knew me and my case so well and was so caring and kind. I was quite upset when I found out she left but the new nurse seems to be very nice and is genuinely caring. Luckily my old nurse briefed my new nurse specifically on my case since it is a bit strange. I really appreciated that!

Anyways, we went in yesterday, CD3, for our baseline ultrasound. There were no cysts (thank God!) and everything looked great! I got a call from my doctor on my way home saying everything was great and we were all set to move forward with the letrozole. She wanted to confirm that since we didn’t do a trial of this protocol, that if everything looked good we could go ahead and transfer. Heck yes! Let’s get those snow babies back where they belong! So I started the letrozole last night. Here is the plan:

• I am to take two 2.5mg pills a day for 5 days which will put us at CD7.
• On CD8 I am to start 2mg Estrace (orally) until transfer.
• We go back on the 7th (CD12) to check my lining and we PRAY that it is above 8mm and is trilaminar.
• If everything looks good on CD12 they will instruct me when to take my HCG shot and they said it will be in the morning this time
• After the HCG shot, I will start Crinone 1x day until 10 weeks gestation
• Transfer should be on the 13th!

That’s all for now folks! I am just kind of laying low after the holidays, trying to get the house back in order and get back into the routine of things. I will post about any side effects from the letrozole. Especially since this is an unusual protocol for an FET!

 

 

 

 

FET#1 – Day 100

It has been 100 days since we started this FET cycle. That is CRAZY! That is almost 1/3 of the year that we have been trying to be reunited with our snowbabies. When we did IVF#2 and froze our two blastocysts, I expected to be apart from them for a month…two at the latest…not 100 days! And we are still at least a month out from transfer.

Time is still flying by…mostly. Sometimes it seems like each minute lasts an hour and then other times I blink and I have jumped ahead two days in the future. It helps that we have had a busy few weeks, even though the busyness hasn’t been due to good things. The Saturday after Thanksgiving we went to a local farm and cut down our Christmas tree. This is a tradition we are starting and it was our 2nd Annual trip. When we got home, we decorated the tree and a friend and I went to a craft store to buy items to make a wreath. While we were there I got a text from my mom telling me that one of my dad’s ferrets was going to the emergency animal hospital. He has two ferrets: Rocky and Buffy. They are his babies. He loves them and spoils them like crazy. Long story short…Buffy went into the animal hospital on Saturday and passed away on Tuesday. My dad is heartbroken. If you know anything about ferrets, they are very social and they bond to one another. When one ferret in a bonded pair dies, it is common for the other one to die within a month unless they bond with another ferret. So, I spent most of my day of Tuesday calling everywhere I could within a 200 mile radius to try and find another ferret for Rocky. Well, by a chance of fate, I was able to find Buffy’s littermate’s daughter! So we roadtripped to Columbus (a 4.5 hour drive each way) to go pick her up last Thursday. Rocky seems to be doing better and isn’t as depressed and mopey and Willow (the new ferret) is enjoying her new home.

Not our ferrets. Our ferrets will not stay still long enough to take a picture this cute. But this is what they look like.

After that fiasco was dealt with, I woke up the next morning with a fever and have been battling an upper respiratory virus ever since. Tis the season! In addition, we found mold on our basement ceiling the other night so we are having that looked at today and there was a brief moment of chaos when the cats attacked and knocked over the 100+lb Christmas tree at 5am! Oh! Did I mention the check engine light on the new SUV came on yesterday? And the deep freezer stopped working so we lost all our pre-prepared casseroles and crockpot meals. Luckily we were down to the last few in there so we didn’t lose much.

All of the craziness has made the time go by faster so that is good. I have been preoccupied with putting out fires that I haven’t had too much time to dwell on the wait. I replaced my NuvaRing on Monday so that made me feel another step closer to our transfer. 13 more days until I take it out for good and then wait for Aunt Flo. Then once she starts, it will only be 19 days until we are reunited with our snowbabies. We are getting so close! By the time we do our transfer, it will have been 5 months since we started this FET!

Day 15 – An Average Day

5:00 AM – First alarm goes off

5:00 – 5:30 AM – Snooze alarms

5:35 AM – Give Marley his medicine

5:40 AM – Make coffee/Chris leaves for work

5:45 – 6:15 AM – Get ready for work

6:45 AM – Arrive at work

7:00 – 11:00 AM – Work, maybe have a meeting or two

11:00 – 12:00 PM – Eat lunch with coworkers or have a working lunch

12:00 – 3:30 PM – Work, maybe have a meeting or two

3:30 PM – Head home and call parents/Grammy on way home

4:00 PM – Walk in door and immediately change into pajamas or sweats

4:30 PM – Put freezer meal in oven for 1.5 hours/Chris arrives home

5:00 – 6:00 PM – Do paint by numbers while Chris watches               YouTube videos

6:30 PM – Eat dinner

7:00 – 8:00 PM – Watch recorded TV shows from night before

8:15 PM – Close the house down, run the dishwasher, take medicine, give Marley his medicine and pick up around the kitchen

8:30 PM – Lay down in bed

8:30 – 9:30 PM – Do crosswords or Sudoku on my phone until I pass out

Day 11 – 15 of My Favorite Things

In no particular order:

1. Porch swings and hammocks, either reading or having tea and good conversation with a friend
2. Super soft blankets, especially up in one freshly out of the dryer
3. Cool Fall days and nights when I can leave the windows open and have fresh air throughout the house
4. When Marley, our cat, curls up at night and I use him as a pillow. He wraps his arms around mine and I put the tip of my finger between his toes
5. Edinburgh, Scotland
6. The time in the morning right before I get up, while snoozing my alarm, and the world is quiet and calm
7. Opening up a package in the mail after forgetting what I ordered, it’s a surprise from myself!
8. The first sip of coffee in the morning and a cup of hot peppermint tea at the end of the day
9. The weightlessness and peace that comes scuba diving under 50 feet of water
10. The way old books smell and feel
11. Thunderstorms and rainy days with the windows open and no where to be
12. The first time I come home after we cleaned the house really well
13. Hot bubble baths
14. When a random distinct smell reminds me of a past memory or feeling and I am transported back in time
15. Receiving an unexpected card or handwritten letter in the mail

FET#1 Days 9 – 14 – More Meds

So it has been about a week since I last posted. Honestly there hasn’t really been that much to tell, except my ranting and ravings as a lunatic on estrogen. I started taking the estrogen vaginally instead of orally and am happy to report that I no longer have nausea and can eat regular meals without them coming back up! I also am not as crazy as I was the first week. Still crazy…just not as crazy. Example: Last Thursday I was sitting at my desk at work and for whatever reason, I thought of the Sarah McLachlan ASPCA commercials with the sad kittens and puppies and I started crying. My boss looked at me, like what happened? And I had to explain that nothing happened, that commercial just popped into my head and made me cry.

  
I called the fertility pharmacy to order the Progesterone in Oil and Crinone. I had been putting it off because I know the cost was going to ruin my mood…you ladies know what I am talking about. For those that haven’t had to be on Crinone, it is expensive…and I will be on it twice a day until the 11th week of pregnancy which should be around Christmas. Each dose is around $20 so do the math on that and it’s $3,600. Ouch! That is how much ALL the meds for the stimming cycle cost! Well, it was a long shot but I talked to my insurance company to see if they would cover it since technically it’s not a fertility medication, it is a hormonal supplement. Well, they said it would require a prior authorization and we went through that process. I wasn’t expecting them to cover much if anything. The pharmacy called me the next morning and said that my insurance is covering 4 boxes of 15 applicators for 30 days! That is $1,200 worth of medication at zero cost to us! Cue happy dance! Also, my doctor ordered me Progesterone in Cottonseed Oil this time around because I had a bit of a reaction to the sesame seed oil last time. This is also supposed to be thinner so maybe, just maybe it won’t hurt as bad! I am not looking forward to the PIO shots again. I was thinking back to how miserable and sore my booty was after just 14 days of them last time and this time around I get the pleasure of having them for 90 days. I will get through it, just like I have gotten through everything else. I am just not all excited about that part.

  
In other news, we had a lazy Saturday and it was amazing. It seemed that we both rotated off taking naps because we were so tired. It was nice to have a peaceful and quiet house while Chris was sleeping. I got some painting done and was able to decompress a little and relax. Then on Sunday it was so beautiful outside that we did a lot of landscaping work. Chris handled the yard and I got to play with our new toy – a hedge trimmer! Those things are amazing (I never thought I would say that about a landscaping tool). I am very OCD and like things very, very even and just right and this tool helped me do it perfectly and quickly! Now the front of our house looks nice and pretty! We also cut back all the dying rose bushes on the side of our house and weeded the area. We have definitely been feeling sore from all the work we did but it looks great! Now…the inside of the house, not so much. We have to get that in order before transfer or I will drive myself crazy looking at it and not being able to clean it.

  
Last, but not least, we had a family trip to the doctor yesterday to get our flu shots. We were told by our IVF nurse to get them at least 2 weeks prior to transfer so it has enough time to build up protection in our systems. Normally I freak out at flu shots and refuse to look at the needle. This time I saw the needle and was like “What? That’s tiny!” and I hardly felt the shot at all. Maybe this whole IVF (specifically PIO) thing is curing me of my fear of needles! Or maybe at this point I am just too tired to care much anymore! Either way it is making doctor’s visits a little less stressful for me so I will take it.

  
As for how I am feeling? I am taking it day by day, hour by hour. The estrogen is really playing with my emotions and my ability to remain positive. I am excited about the transfer, but I don’t feel I am excited as I was last time. I attribute that to the hormones making me feel down and anxious. I am hoping as the date gets closer that I will become more excited. I just don’t really know what to say right now. I don’t want to sound like a downer because I am not. I am more just tired right now. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. I feel like very little thing requires so much more effort and all I want to do is close my eyes and sleep until its time to transfer.