FET#1 Update – 62 Days and Counting…

Still no Aunt Flo…

It’s like the universe is playing a cruel joke on me. The one time I want her to come, I beg her to come, she is elusive. I keep having cramps, sometimes to the point I am convinced I have started, only to go check and alas…nothing. I talked to the nurse on Thursday. I am scheduled for an ultrasound tomorrow (Tuesday) to see what’s going on. She assured me that I will have a period at some point. The issue is the holidays are coming up. The cut-off for a regular FET cycle is November 4th. Since we are doing a letrozole prep we have a bit more time, but not much. The lab closes down over the holidays for a deep clean. The last day they can do a transfer is December 9th. So basically, Aunt Flo better show up soon or we will have to wait until January to do the transfer…

The thought of waiting until January makes me very sad. I want to be reunited with our snowbabies so badly. I do understand about the lab closing over the holidays…but quite frankly…it sucks. I have thought about some perks to it though. Christmastime is my favorite time of year and it would be nice to have a bit of a break from all the infertility stuff over the holidays. Where I am not concerned with what cycle day it is, or symptom spotting. And, playing devil’s advocate here, say we did transfer December 9th…that means our beta would be right before Christmas. It could mean an awesome Christmas or a very, very sad Christmas. If the babies don’t stick, would that put a damper on all Christmases from here on out? Would I remember every Christmas as the time that we lost our babies…again? I don’t know if I want to deal with that. I am trying to remain positive and thinking it could be the best Christmas gift ever! But what if it isn’t? That tiny voice in the back of my mind keeps saying…what if?

Yes, I listened to Christmas songs on the way to work this morning. Yes, I am that person…

Another perk of waiting until January to transfer would be that I could drink over the holidays. That would be nice! I could focus on myself and maybe shedding a few more pounds before transfer. I am basically talking out loud. I am coming up with all the reasons that it would be good to wait until January because, if history is any indication, nothing goes the way I want it to so why would it change now? I go from feeling dejected about the whole situation to trying to look at the positive. It is so frustrating. We have been on this IVF journey for 6 months. I know many women who have been on it for much longer, but still, 6 months is a long time. Especially when every moment of every day is symptom spotting, injecting medications, cycle day counting, booking appointments, ultrasounds, needle sticks…you get the idea…

So anyway, think of us tomorrow at our ultrasound. Hopefully we won’t get bad news. I don’t really know what to expect. At this point I feel a little lost. A little down. A little frustrated. But, c’est la vie. I will pick myself up and keep trucking along.

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15 responses to “FET#1 Update – 62 Days and Counting…

  1. 😦 What a cruel joke! I can’t believe you are still waiting, and I can’t even imagine how stressful it must be to have everything running together with the holidays now. I hope you get your period soon so that you can keep working toward being reunited!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is a tough call! I remember being in the same boat as you last year with our transfer. We ended up transferring on december 19th and got our BFP on Christmas Eve. But i was scared to death it could have went the other way and ruined my holiday. Best of luck and I really hope that period of yours comes soon!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This is probably stupid…but have you taken a pregnancy test? Weirder things have happened.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I ‘liked’ in support of you, not because I like what is happening πŸ™‚
    Honestly I have no advice, we are often at AFs whim and that sucks bigtime. I would be trying anything I can. Trying to help out gravity by doing jumping jacks and walking/running a lot. I would also be doing lunges or pilates or something to try and stretch that area out hahaha.
    I have learned that there is no ‘silly’ when it comes to IF, you try it all πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • I appreciate the support!! Girl, I have tried it all…parsley tea, parsley up my hooha, running, lavender oil, sex, scary movie to get adrenaline going, heating pad, evening primrose oil, hot bath, yoga…the only thing I haven’t done yet is acupuncture and that’s because it’s expensive, but I might be doing that tomorrow depending on the ultrasound!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I’m so frustrated for you 😦 I’ve been waiting for my period to come too and just did the counting today and realised I will miss my IVF cycle before Christmas and have to wait til Jan 😦 So all these things you talk about why waiting til Jan is a good thing I’m totally going through my head too.
    I’ll have my fingers crossed for you though that everything goes well X

    Liked by 1 person

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