I am in a daze. I slept on and off last night. My eyes have been crusted shut from tears. I am trying to distract myself any way possible until the doctor calls. Today was supposed to be an exciting day. Our meds are arriving. It still is exciting because we have chosen to move forward with the cycle, but I will feel so much better after talking with the doctor. There were not very many questions the nurse could answer. I can predict the answers to my questions since we have been on this ride before. We are planning for the worst case scenario. I am still hoping that maybe they mixed up the sample or the nurse read the results wrong even though I know that is most likely just wishful thinking. I am trying to keep my head up. Chris is doing much better than I am. He is my rock.
Trying to regain the positivity I had just 7 days ago is like trying to climb Mount Everest. I don’t know how to get back there. But I will. We will.